Idiocracy

Spurred on by an op-ed article in today's Times, I came home and On-Demanded the film Idiocracy. The article mentioned Idiocracy in reference to Ann Coulter's lastest piece of worthwhile rhetorical brilliance because of it's...brilliance, as well as the context of the word. Then again, she doesn't "think there's anything offensive about any variation of faggy, faggotry, faggot, fag." So It really wasn't an issue. "Well, the thing is -- one is, yes, it can be used that way, I gather that's the way Isaiah Washington used it, That, I think, is an incorrect of the word -- use of the word." Heaven forbid anyone mistake her intentions! She seems so clear about them! Really, she should have nutted up, gone all British on us and called him a "poof." Alas, to paraphrase the old Bill Clinton line that Ms. Coulter loves so much, it depends on what the meaning of the word "faggot" is.

I digress. In Idiocracy, writer/director Mike Judge tells the story of America in 2505 where a half-millennium of lust, catch-phrases, corporatization and mass-reproduction by the illiterati has led to a world of absolute buffoons on the brink of destruction. Luke Wilson is cryogenically frozen and accidentally awoken in 2505 only to be disgusted and astounded by what he sees. Coincidentally, his ability to use such words as "disgusted" and "astounded" has him ridiculed by the locals for talking "all faggy." The point being, Judge's picture is a spot-on representation of a dystopian America. It is the kind of place driven by sex, money, explosions, bar code tattoos and corporate sponsorship. The kind of place with "adult" Starbucks, "adult" tax returns, masturbation networks and Costco Law School; where the President is a former WWE star and justice is served with Monster Trucks and brought to you by Carl's Jr. But don't feel left out, boys, it ain't all its cracked up to be.

In such a world, you might find a POTUS who says stuff like "I'm the decider" and "Well, you know, I think a lot of people are in this fight. I mean, they sacrifice peace of mind when they see the terrible images of violence on T...TV every night." A world where suburban housewives take lessons in pole dancing, and where the things people drink are called Xtremo and ESPN the Flavor. Here, kids get called a "fag" for knowin' shit about dividing fractions, and kids who are perceived to be fags get beaten into concussive states, or worse. It is too bad Ms. Coulter wasn't around to explain that the defendant didn't mean anything by it. He was only beating the shit out of a guy for being a faggy swimmer, not for liking guys sexually or anything like that. No biggie! Sean Hannity would understand. Not to be Slander-ous, of course, because I'm sure neither would condone the act.

Hey, wait, all that last paragraph is happening now! Holy Shit! To be sure, I play a vital role in society's downfall. Lord knows I have seen the Juggernaut video three or four dozen times, and anyone who was subjected to more than 20 minutes at the Da Brat Stable House last summer knows what sort of incessant Marc M. catch phrase buffoonery, with all of it's vulgarity and generally unconscionable vocabulary, went on ad nauseum between my housemates and me. Irony knows some bounds, after all. But of course, I don't mean to call today's cultural state ruinous or anything. On the contrary, come on out to Quabbin Qountry any time if you want to see just how flavorful things can be. But I try my hardest not to forget the simplicity, the labels, the laziness and the selfishness that I see every day, and that is just in my elementary classroom. I won't get started on Washington. Maybe all we need is a little straight talk, or maybe that's the problem. I just hope we aren't seven years too late.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go upstairs and masturbate.

Ahoy with an India'n,
BTB

Madness, Woman Madness

Yo, Word:
http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com/2007/03/01/gingrich-calls-current-debates-lunacy/

Ahoy,
BTB

"This incident...smacked me in the eyes one peaceful Sunday morning a few weeks ago"

I'm back on the sauce. The strong sauce, that is. Ever since that one magical week in December, 2004 that I spent holed up in Mocha Joe's basement cafe in Brattleboro, VT reading the magnificent journal of Nixon's re-election, Hunter S. Thompson's Fear and Loathing: On the Campaign Trail '72, I have not been the same person. Prior to that week I had seen life through a different set of eyes. It was a set of eyes that was far more naive, foolish and willing to settle. A set of eyes that had not read the words vile, swine, freak, or maniac nearly enough. Upon closing the back cover of the book, I ruminated for a few hours and then immediately got on the horn to spread the gospel. Within days I was in my car driving south to Guilford, CT where I left my bargain copy of the text with a crew of intellectually and soulfully untouchable gentlemen hoping it would spread like gonorrhea at Mardi Gras, and hoping I would never see it again. I can't promise results on the first, but I will vouch for the fact that I never saw that short, fat, red tome ever again. I held it in my memories, but I never held it close to my breast to keep me warm on some of those hairy Allston nights later on; nor to keep me sane on those riotous stable nights in the summer of 2006. Perhaps that whole freaky period (December, 2004 -Present) was too far removed from a real election to make it worthwhile. Perhaps I was afraid. Then again, maybe I just never got around to replacing it.

That all changed this past Monday. Wandering around Northampton after an offseason high school track practice looking for a copy of the New York Times to bring into a coffee shop so that I might climb upon it's pretensions to gain the proper footing to flirt with an older, liberal local female sipping a pot of organic green tea at 5 in the afternoon I came upon a bookstore with seven copies of '72 stocked among it's verbal weaponry. It was a true omen, seeing as I hadn't been able to causally locate a copy in some years, in spite of noticing title upon title of Gonzo Papers, Las Vegas and Hey Rube but never the Golden Goose. I picked one up and haven't looked back.

"It was just before midnight when I left Cambridge and headed north in U.S. 93 toward Manchester--driving one of those big green rented Auto/stick Cougars that gets rubber for about twenty-nine seconds in Drive, and spits hot black divots all over the road in First or Second ... a terrible screeching and fishtailing through the outskirts of Boston heading north to New Hampshire, back on the Campaign Trail ...running late, as usual: left hand on the wheel and the other on the radio dial, seeking music, and a glass of iced Wild Turkey spilling into my crotch on every turn (43)."

That is where it begins, both for Hunter and myself: a commitment to the '72 Campaign Trail and a deep-rooted love of Austin Nichols, bred on cold nights after closing up Harriman's Pub in West Dover, Vermont and warm nights dreaming of the gulf stream in Cotuit, Massachusetts with Manchester, Nashua, Keene, Berlin and all the rest on the docket.

The Lord knows that I am a small fraction of Hunter S. Thompson, but the Lord also knows a thing or two about inspiration. With that said, it is likely only a matter of time before we see some sort of bootleg publication of Thugs and Cowardice: On the Campaign Trail '08. Then again, given that the New Hampshire primary was in March of 1972, perhaps a more fitting title would be On the Campaign Trail '07-'08. Frontloading, shame be thy name.

In the meantime I have briefly traded digs, tonight choosing The Spoke over the M & D, in part because of prior engagements and in part because this is the kind of place where you can see fat, drunken townies mingling some 10 feet away from a table full of pre-gaming sorority sisters on their way, ultimately, to The Pub. Over yonder sits a woman on a barstool with a Weezer tattoo on her neck. The whole fuckin' pie, by the way, with wings and everything. She is obnoxiously loud, and probably prefers Beverly Hills to Why Bother?. To Hell with that. In the words of Rivers, "I know I should get next to you/You got a look that makes me think you're cool/But it's just sexual attraction/Not something real so I'd rather keep wackin'/Why bother? it's gonna hurt me/It's gonna kill when you desert me/This happened to me twice before/It won't happen to me anymore." Then again, who am I to judge?

Lastly, let me give a shout out to the Indian Hill Cemetery (aka the Sem-ET-ery, copyright James S., 2004). I randomly thought about this place tonight because of the facebook and it's infernally lovable newsfeed. I have seen so many sunsets at that place, it's not even funny. Yet how is it that I hadn't thought about the place in 3 years?? O hallowed Indian Hill. Hail, hail, Mattabeseck.

Meanwhile, it's Ballard Bitter all the way. Ya Sure? Ya Betcha!
BTB

Tek-mology

There is something to be said for the typewriter when you lose an hour and a half of passionate, past-your-bedtime writing because of a browser error and a failure to repeatedly save. FUCK!!!!

Beerfest

Every trip back to the Puget Sound is like an easter egg hunt, only with beer. 2007 revealed the following hoppy gems behind salal bushes and driftwood (in taste rank):

Manny's Pale Ale
Full Sail LTD #1
Bridgeport IPA
Maritime Pacific IPA
Deschutes Black Butte Porter
Big Sky Crystal Ale
Toby's Parrot Red Ale
New Belgium Fat Tire
Pyramid Snow Cap Ale
Deschutes Mirror Pond Pale Ale
Maritime Pacific Jolly Roger
Cutter's Amber Ale
Mac and Jack's African Amber
Alaskan Amber
Mac and Jack's IPA
Skagit River Scullers IPA
Lagunitas Hairy Eyeball

Back in Quabbin Qountry,
BTB

3Q WORLD TOUR: The Mitt-igator

Is Mitt Romney the Teflon candidate of 2008? For his sake, he had better be. Romney has been all under the news lately. Last week his official announcement on Tuesday (prepared remarks here) was overshadowed by the Valentine's Day snowstorm that shut down the East Coast. He was cut short on an early Bush endorsement. Worst of all have been the growing number of recent disclosures that Mitt has been changing a lot of his opinions with the convenient timing of the 2008 election cycle's beginning. The more I read about him, the more I become completely baffled by his candidacy. On the one hand, I will freely admit that he has a certain je ne aise quoi about him, and I don't think I am the only one who believes that. Plus he likes to use charts, and who doesn't love charts?!! Even though the news hasn't been the greatest, and not a lot of people had heard of the guy six months ago, it seems like the more people hear, the more they want to know.

But will they like what they hear? Mitt, it seems, is more than willing to try his darnedest to make that answer "yes". But is his darnedest too darned much? First it was his abortion flop, based on his 1994 statement an abortion, "I believe society should allow individuals to do whatever they choose," that he is currently running away from as quickly as possible. Then came his statement to the Log Cabin Republicans on gay rights: "We must make equality for gays and lesbians a mainstream concern." Uh oh. That may have worked well in Provincetown, but it ain't working in Allentown. Queue up 2006, and he is pushing a ballot to ban gay marriage in Mass. Last of all his been his NRA flap. The Boston Globe revealed yesterday that Romney joined the NRA in August of 2006. I imagine he said something a long the lines of: "You know, I have always been a strong supporter of gun rights, but my planned neighborhood in Belmont, a dry town you know, didn't allow gun owners until very recently." Actually, I think his official response was through a spokesman and basically said, "we care about the future of gun freedom and not the past." The Republicans would show themselves, and not for the first time, to be extremely hypocritical if they elected a flip-flop artist from Massachusetts to represent them. At this point, we know Sam Brownback won't allow it. Then again, as Mitt himself said, "I was not always a Ronald Reagan conservative. Neither was Ronald Reagan, by the way. But like him, I learned with experience."

In other news, Republican candidate Ron Paul is sponsoring a hemp bill along with 9 Democratic co-sponsors including Dem candidate Dennis Kucinich. Oh, and don't get me started about how more and more columnists are talking about the potential demise of face-to-face campaigning. I think one of these days I am going to write a 15,000 word rant about it. Long Live the Granite State!

Still in the Tac,
BTB

3Q WORLD TOUR

Greetings from the first stop on the Quabbin Qountry Queries World Tour '07: the Mandolin Cafe in Tacoma, Washington. It is cloudy and 50 degrees outside with intermittent periods of rain, enough to keep the windows on display with a constant splattering of drops, but not enough to really discourage any outdoor activity. It is the kind of weather in which I walk to the grocery store to gaze in wonder at the soul-pleasing display of inimitable NW micros while my shopping basket overflows with Tim's Cascade Jalapeno chips, Tillamook Cheddar and, were it June, a pound or two of Copper River Salmon. It is the kind of weather that I know, that eases the sting of a 12-mile run and soothes a pitcher-induced hangover.

Special Valentine's Edition - The Power of Love (not by Huey Lewis)

We are having a Valentine's snow day up here in Quabbin Qountry, and with it plenty of time to do the lazy sit-around-the-house things that work days don't allow, and weekends discourage with their travels and hangovers. All morning I have delighted in watching the birds compete for the freshly-tossed seed on my front porch with a diagonally blowing sleet falling behind them. Yet the warm, woodstoven confines of my apartment have allowed me to anxiously await the days I can go outside in running shorts again.

I was also able to bask in the pleasures of multimedia with half of the second season of Kids in the Hall and a few movies on the premium channels. All this media overload was taxing on a simple man like myself, and only worked to reiterate the allure of power and money to both women and men, as evidenced in the great number of Presidential aspirants this time around. The idea of White House sex being the best possible sex is intriguing, and quite possibly truthful. Why else would it run in the Adams, Roosevelt and Bush families? Why else would Hillary be running, and both Doles gave it a shot? Why was Al Gore so horny? They heard the whispers, the rumours, the creaking and the thuds like nothing they had ever heard before. It leaves the rest of us schmucks sitting at home, wondering what might be, wondering if women will ever figure it out that if a guy is into money then he is almost certainly into M.O.B.

But here in Quabbin Qountry, we have acres of virgin snow in the woods, ripe for the taking. I'm putting on tights, a sweatshirt, my new Holyoke Athletic Staff pullover, a hat and gloves and getting it on. Three cheers for February, and that unmistakable squishy sound that only comes when shoes and snow meet in the crevasse of a footprint.

While I'm at it - a Valentine's Day Playlist.

Ask - The Smiths
So. Central Rain - R.E.M. (video)
Jackie Wilson Said - Van Morrison
I Married Her Just Because She Looks Like You - Lyle Lovett
Night Moves - Bob Seger
Beautiful Girls - Van Halen
Patience - Guns N Roses
Hard Candy - Counting Crows
The Heat of the Moment - Asia
Knockin' Da Boots - H-Town
This Must Be the Place - Talking Heads
Song for the Dumped - Ben Folds Five

In the words of Cabbagehead: "A guy has an English accent and you're all wet. You're a lake. But a guy's got a little green on his shoulders and you puke. That's sexual discrimination!"

Festivale,
BTB

Minced Words

Not sure if you caught it two weeks ago, but Prez. Bush was interviewed by NPR's Juan Williams, his first after the State of the Union address. At one point during the talk, Williams brought up the issue of Bush and the "Democrat" congress, and not strongly enough according to some. As The New Yorker's Hendrik Hertzberg noted last summer, Bush's frequent misuse of the noun "Democrat" in place of the adjective "Democratic" as an intentional slur to refuse the association of donkeys and democracy is obnoxious, overly partisan, and even McCarthy-esque. Here is the exchange:

MR. WILLIAMS: By the way, in the speech, you spoke about the Democrats. You said, you congratulated the Democrat majority. And I notice your prepared text said Democratic majority. I surely think that you know that for the Democrats, they think when you say Democrat, it's like fingernails on the blackboard. They don't like it. They like you to say Democratic.
PRESIDENT BUSH: Yeah. Well, that was an oversight then. I mean, I'm not trying to needle. Look, I went into the hall saying we can work together and I was very sincere about it. I didn't even know I did it.

You didn't know you did it, huh? See Hertzberg's article for a notation of other misuses, and further see that the White House issued an edited transcript of the speech where "Democrat" is embedded in place of the original "Democratic." If Bush's flub was unintentional, why go to the trouble of changing the history books? I guess because Bush's words are Bush's words, and I don't think he has written a speech since Andover, and even then he probably winged it. To add insult to injury, Bush feigned dumb again 4 days later at the Dems' Colonial Williamsburg retreat when he opened with this line:

"Now, look, my diction isn't all that good," the president said. "I have been accused of occasionally mangling the English language. And so I appreciate you inviting the head of the Republic Party."

Laugh it up, diction boy. I wouldn't mind hearing intentional slights from the likes of political hacks of Tom DeLay's stature, but I expect more knowledge, respect and gravitas from my President. On a lighter note, Bush called Juan Williams by name, "Juan", a full nine times during the sixteen-question interview. If you are keeping score, that is a .563 average. Big time score for the Spanglo-Texan!

The other big news on the campaign trail was Obama's official campaign kickoff at the Olde Statehouse in Springfield, Illinois, the Land of Lincoln. He spoke of a range of topics from his Christian faith and the death penalty to the presumptuousness of a Presidential announcement and Abe Lincoln's glorious leadership, all under the umbrella of Springfield the crossroads. The Springfield of farmers and friends, the Springfield of bold statements, but most importantly the Springfield that is far, far away from Washington. His speech was to demonstrate Obama the Hopeful, Obama the Outsider, Obama the Future. Also, he has taken to say "I love you" a lot. That might not be such a bad thing, if it catches on, and it certainly won't hurt him with the ladies.

Speaking of the ladies, Giuliani's third wife went off recently about how hunky her man is. Judy G. went to bat for Rudy (Judy & Rudy??) in the NY Post:

"I've always liked strong, macho men, and Rudy — I'm not saying this because he's my husband — is one of the smartest people on the planet. What people don't know is that Rudy's a very, very romantic guy. We love watching 'Sleepless in Seattle.' Can you imagine my big testosterone-factor husband doing that?" Describing Rudy, a former federal prosecutor, as "the Energizer Bunny with no rechargeable batteries," Judi said, "One of the most remarkable things about my husband, who sleeps three or four hours a night, is his energy level and stamina."

As Borat might say, "Wa-Wa-Wee-Wa! He has a-stamina, it is nice!!!!"

Mitt the Mormon's better half, meanwhile, got into the wife game with a little pushback of her own. "The biggest difference between Mitt Romney and the other [GOP] candidates," she said, is that Mitt has "only had one wife." Ouch!! Take that, conservative voters, and props to Mitt the man. Romney, of course, will be announcing his candidacy tomorrow in his dad's old state of Michigan, at the Henry Ford Museum much to the ire of Jewish groups everywhere. More to come!

Getting away from politics, I have been lamenting my recent departure from Quabbinish run postings. I can directly attribute this to a rise in training with the Purple Knights and two weekends in a row dominated by late nights and lazy Sundays. Will I regret my failure to go for a moonlit walk in the snow, or stomping an uncharted path through my back woods? Perhaps. But motivation is the wiliest of devils. Wilier even than spirits.

Achel Blond,

BTB

Mixed Bag

We are going to do a little McLaughlin Group tonight here at 3Q HQ.

Item! Governor Rick Perry declares HPV vaccine for all! In a surprise move last week, the Texas Republican mandated that 11- and 12-year-old schoolgirls statewide receive the newly finalized vaccine against human papilloma virus, brought to you by the nice folks at Merck Pharmaceuticals. Obviously, a lot of people were screaming mad about this because of the intrusive nature, the fact that Merck gave Perry money during the campaign (a measly 6$k), the cost (some $360 for three shots) and most notably the moral implications. It is fairly easy to raise hell over a virus that can be readily labeled as a benign consequence of promiscuous sex, but to any opponents out there who think that I say "Bah Humbug!" Any time we have a chance to eradicate a virus I say let's do it. Would the religious right think twice about mandatory AIDS vaccines under the premise that if everyone only had one partner their entire life AIDS would go away? Doubtful. Why give HPV such an unfair shake. In the words of Gov. Perry, "If I err, I will err on the side of protecting life." Now there is some pro-life sentiment that I can agree with!

Item! PAC donations now directed toward the jukebox! At this year's Democratic winter meetings, many of the Presidential aspirants debuted possible stump speech theme songs (and part 2). Hilarity ensued. Here is the lineup in case you are too lazy to peep the links:

Wesley Clark: "Waiting On The World To Change" - John Mayer
Hillary Clinton: "Right Here, Right Now" - Jesus Jones
Chris Dodd: "Get Ready" - The Temptations
John Edwards: "This Is Our Country" - John Mellencamp
Dennis Kucinich: "America the Beautiful" - standard
Joe Biden: "Centerfield" - John Fogerty
Bill Richardson: "Lean on Me" - Club Nouveau
Tom Vilsack: "Reach Out I'll Be There" - The Four Tops

Well, I am glad to report that these are merely first drafts. Can you imagine being motivated by John Mayer? The Temptations? Jesus Jones? Jesus Jones! I mean, if you are going to do John Fogerty, give me something like Run through the Jungle or Midnight Special.
Well, you wake up in the mornin, you hear the work bell ring,
And they march you to the table to see the same old thing.
Ain't no food upon the table, and no pork up in the pan.
But you better not complain, boy, you get in trouble with the man
At any rate, they are bound to be better than whatever the GOP trots out. Unless it ends up being Jesus Jones. Then it will be worse.

Item! Biden Redux. Just wanted to drop a link to my birthday-mate Pat Boo-kan-on's take on BidenGate. Pattycake essentially shares my views on the incident:

• "Joe is saying that if Hillary, at 100 percent name recognition and with all the support she and Bill have been able to corral, can't break 30 percent or 40 percent in Democratic polls today, she is a likely sure loser in 2008. Is there a political analyst in America who has not wondered about the same thing? And what of Hillary's new stand on Iraq?"
  
• "If Joe Biden, whose views of his colleagues' acumen on foreign policy are now and forever on record, will undertake that assignment, he could make his presidential run not only interesting, but a service to his party and his country."

• Finally, it seems that John Edwards might be getting into some trouble over his hired bloggers. Obviously, he didn't look far enough away from North Carolina. Let me throw it out there right now, I'm Quabbin for Hire. I can even put up with too much Mellencamp, but first a caveat: I would incessantly stump for the use of I Need a Lover or Cherry Bomb. In the meantime, 17 has turned 25 here in Quabbin Qountry and I'm surprised that I'm still blogging. Time to sign off once again from the Moan.

YSB,
BTB

Next up: Bush called out, money talks, and more!

Rumblin', Bumblin', Stumblin

Democrats, please direct your attention to the starting gate. It is there that you will find the latest controversy to hit the race - Cleangate. Senator Joe Biden officially declared himself a candidate yesterday, and quickly overshadowed even himself by putting one foot forward, and the other directly in his mouf. In a now famous article in the New York Observer, Biden took issue with some of his primary competitors, most notably on their Iraq policies.

Referring to Clinton, Obama and Edwards Biden said the following: "Let me put it this way, you didn’t hear any one of them get in this debate at all until they announced for President." Bold. To be honest, though, it is not entirely without truth. Clinton's rhetoric underwent a recent and dramatic ramp-up with timing that only a friend would call coincidental. Edwards has been speaking out against the war for the past year or two, but again it has seemed to be in tune with his own candidacy post-2005. Obama, however, has his 2002 speech to his credit as well as his perhaps critical timing for not being around for the authorization vote.

Fitting, it was with Obama that Biden really did his damage. The Delaware senator referred to Barack the candidate as "the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy." A squall erupted shortly thereafter, mostly from the blogoshpere - which is now tumultuously known to bring the ionic fury on a regular basis. There was a cacaphonic shout of the old Eminem line, "ah, wait, no way, youre kidding, he didnt just say what I think he did, did he?" Obama came out nice at first noting that he "didn’t take it personally and I don’t think he intended to offend. But the way he constructed the statement was probably a little unfortunate.” But a few hours later the handlers got to him and he came back with a much harsher retort when he said, “I didn’t take Senator Biden’s comments personally, but obviously they were historically inaccurate. African-American presidential candidates like Jesse Jackson, Shirley Chisholm, Carol Mosely-Braun and Al Sharpton gave a voice to many important issues through their campaigns, and no one would call them inarticulate.”

Al Sharpton was predictably pissed, and Jesse Jackson even mocked the fact that he outdrew Biden in '88 by extreme margins. And Biden retaliated with a full-scale apology assault, as any Senator worth his weight in votes would do. But the real issue was whether this was merely a linguistic lapse or, more distressingly, another macaca moment. Biden is well-known as long-winded, and on first appearance it seems that he just said a few too many words at a time when he was a little too hopped up to make a politically clear statement, given his singeing of his other colleagues. But who can really say? In spite of the reaction from Jackson and Sharpton, Obama really is the first African-American candidate with a chance. I don't care how PC you are, to quote Ron Burgundy, "It's a fact" that no one has had a chance until Barack. Did his use of the combination of "clean", "bright", and "articulate" to emphasize the difference between Obama and his candidatorial predecessors fall flat on it's face? Yes. Was it totally inaccurate? Probably. But was it malicious or just a mistake? Only Joe's conscience knows. I have a feeling it was the former, rather than the latter.

The thing is, Biden never had a shot to have Jesse Jackson or Al Sharpton in his corner. In some respects he really shouldn't give a shit about what they have to say. They were going to turn on him at one point or another until/unless he got the nomination. But then again, it is not the first flub he has made. There was the 7-11 comment last year, and he also once said that he could run well in the South because "Delaware was one of our slave states." The first one was clearly insensitive; the second one, hilarious. Insensitive because it is reinforcing a negative cultural stereotype. Hilarious because it was a slight against the Republican South, and nothing else. What it ultimately comes down to is that Biden can't keep hold of his tongue, and rightly so. Will he be elected President come 2008? No. Did anyone ever think that he would? Besides himself and his biggest suck-up friends, No. I just hope that this latest comment won't detract from the positive impact he can have on the debate this upcoming year, because I think Biden will have good things to say, and may even force a response from his rivals. A response that will nevertheless eventually be attributed to the political boneyard, most recently represented in Delaware lore by Pete DuPont. Soon enough Wilmington will be singing Pierre, roll over, I just hope it won't be until late February at the very least.

Racer 5 big bottle,
BTB

Road to the Nomination - GOP

The GOP is even further over the map than the Dems. Will that prove them to be more salt of the earth? Can a cinderella candidate like Ouachita Baptist take on a traditional powerhouse like BYU? Altitude may prove to be a factor, as will homecourt advantage and the tiny confines of Wartburg College. With enough candidates to require a play-in round, this much is for sure - we're gonna have a battle on our hands! Let the wedge issue advocacy begin!























Again, let me know what you think about the format and the seedings. As Guy Noir might say, see you in St. Paul!

Road to the Nomination - Dems

One thing that I have noticed about this cycle's potential nominees is that they are not the usual incestuous family of Ivy Leaguers. In fact, there are quite a few obscure state schools in the mix, not to mention two NESCAC representatives. The next two 3Q posts will examine this phenomenon with a mock-up of the NCAA Final Four Tournament done in haste on a shitty MS Paint program. Let's start with the Dems! Click on the image below for a more in-depth look at your favorite politicians and their Alma maters!

Feel free to drop your analysis on seedings, etc. in the comments section.

Next up, the GOP!

Can't You Smell That Smell?

It was a far-flung weekend, full of tight schedules, multiple cities and a handful of excess. First and foremost I would like to congratulate a true Qrowned Prince of the Quabbin on his continued rise to greatness, this time on the indoor track. I was able to cool down with Owen, once again darting among unsuspecting pedestrians on Commonwealth Avenue, although this time with a pounding headache courtesy of a night spent alongside the Ace. For an old has-been it was like indoor track fantasy camp on that cooldown minus the trading card.

The best antedote for a frenetic Friday and Saturday, I figured, was a nice, long run down to the shores of the Quabbin. Given the relative lack of fitness under my belt during these past few months, it was the first time I was able to make it all the way down to the end of the Gate 8 Road. Unlike my sunkist front yard the gritty Quabbin path still had a majority of snow cover, even at a lower altitude. I trekked down the way, leaving evenly paced footprints behind as I ran alongside closed gates to my left and raced the flow of a snowy creek to my right. I was rewarded at 35:39 with a wide-open Reservoir in front of me. Serenity holds such a tight grip on the lake that the mere shuffling of my feet as I slowed to a stop scattered an entire flock of ducks, floating casually on the shore 100 yards away, off toward Prescott Peninsula. The trees came straight down to shoreline, the green of the needles becoming the brown of bark becoming the slate gray of rock and the cool blue of water.

O Quabbin, my Puget Sound away from home!

Back on the Presidential trail, where things aren't always as calm as they are in Quabbin Qountry, the wheels kept moving forward. Obama got some good press in the Times, while Hillary got some bad press in New York and Washington. Frank Rich, that old sailor, really takes Hilly to task on her Iraq turn, and rightly so.

"Mrs. Clinton has always been a follower of public opinion on the war, not a leader," Rich says, "Now events are outrunning her. Support for the war both in the polls and among Republicans in Congress is plummeting faster than she can recalibrate her rhetoric."

Broder, meanwhile, takes offense to her political speech at the recent Patraeus hearing in the Senate where Hillary asks but one question, followed by a four word response, to the new commander of US forces in Iraq. When both the liberal lion and the elder statesman, respectively, are mocking you this early on it can't be a good sign.

I have made it perfectly clear that here in Quabbin Qountry we seek genuineness, and that we are big fans of Mr. Rich's work. When he essentially calls the Hill Bus(c)h Lite for her scripted town hall meetings and softball questions, it hits hard. I bore witness to some of those scripted Bush rallies back in the Rockies and I am still recovering from the affront on my soul that was a bunch of blank-eyed supporters cheering at the appropriate money lines. It is true that now more than ever we need someone "for realz" in the oval office. Allow me to recount a story I heard recently, courtesy of future-star Oz Hazel:

"Back in the day there was a question about who the republicans wouldnominate for the presidency, Lincoln or Douglas. Lincoln knew that Douglas supported slavery and that he argued the Constitution required the states to continue to allow the trade of men. Lincoln, not having much experience or expertise, went to the library and studied the constitution and other texts for several days prior to the Republican convention. At theconvention he stood up and gave a TWO hour speech about why he believed thatthe framers did not intend slavery to continue forever. At the conclusionof his speech the delegates voted unanimously for Lincoln to be the nominee."

Would that it were that Iraq was as clear-cut an issue as slavery! Alas, what I truly fear is not that any one candidate can give a comprehensive and heart-felt speech on a given topic but whether or not the American public still has it in them, after all the spin and all the advertising dollars, to smell the smell of genuine. It is a beautiful smell, but elusive. Not like pine trees or apple pie, genuine drifts past one's nose like a mosquito escaping two clapped hands. Those who are impostrous are the hardest to pin down, and are usually fat with a stomach full of fresh blood. But what keeps us coming back to the Quabbin is the real scent, the real scene of peninsulas jutting down on to glassy water, and the stillness of the dusk air. Can we find it in 2008?

De Ranke XX,

BTB

Primary Paranoia, or, Caucus in Yer Face

It really got my blood boiling today when I heard that more states are looking to push their primaries and caucuses up into early February. If I may invoke the great "Weird" Al Yankovic, this would make the early campaign frenzy not just Bad, but Even Worse. My dread exists in part because I can't tell if my strong gut reaction is the right one. The arrogance shown by the likes of California, Illinois, New Jersey and Florida is sickening, as to be expected from such questionable states. Have you ever met anyone from Florida or California? If you have, they are probably the self-important type who would display such a me-first, party-be-damned attitude. The last thing we need is an ever greater focus on early fundraising to purchase precious advertising time in the LA, SF, CHI, MIA, ORL and Tri-States markets.

Then again, it might be interesting to see how candidates market themselves to such a diverse brew of electorates. What kind of remarkably two-faced son-of-a-bitch can simultaneously pitch immigration (SoCal/FL), high minimum wage (NorCal), heartland values (IL), and whatever New Jersey cares about while at the same time wearing plaid earmuffs and shoveling down hotcakes in the Upper Merrimack Valley? I worry that it would frontload the thing even more, although in the Times article Tad Devine argues that it could lead to a bitter showdown among multiple frontrunners, which is ideal. As we say up here on the Quabbin, the more backroom deals and delegate trading, the better!

Meanwhile, those four big states must be enviously muttering to themselves how it is a bunch of hogwash that some podunk whitebread state has so much sway in a diverse and metropolitan Democratic Party. To make matters worse, New Hampshire has a neighborly lean toward candidates from New England (Kerry in '04, Tsongas in '92, Dukakis in '88), which currently stands as the American Presidential wasteland. Welcome to nowheresville, Mr. Romney. We stopped making Presidents here in New England back in the 60's. But to Hell with it, now we just transcend them. On the one hand, some might think that New Hampshire is a good, moderate decision-making entity for a candidate with it's centrist roots, but if that is the goal then the Dems ought to go with Missouri, who last preferred the losing candidate in 1956 when Missourians wanted the rest of the country to "Show-Me" that affable old egghead Adlai Stevenson, one of only seven states to do so. Such begrudging respect for Missouri, emphasis on grudge.

So we must quote the late Tip O'Neill, former Massachusetts congressman, House Majority Leader and boss of Chris Matthews when we say "all politics is local." As a result, it stings to think that our beloved Granite State might lose some of it's political clout. That same Granite State that is synonymous with Primaries, where you can shake the future President's hand in a high school gym, eat hot dogs with a Senator on a hot August afternoon in downtown Manchester before grabbing a beer at Strange Brew, and see a big shot drive from Berlin all the way down to Keene in a single day to personally get out the vote. Most days these assholes don't set foot outside of anywhere but the Senate halls and $1,000-a-plate fundraisers. And now people want to maim New Hampshire, the last great bastion of man-to-man stump speeches, and the last place where a politician gets to (or, heaven forbid, has to) act like a true human being. Then again, maybe I just have an irrational desire that every would-be President jump off the Rte. 175 Bridge into the Pemi River to prove his mettle.

And in the shout-outs section of the Queries, I want to give some props to my old commander Steve Haro, quoted in today's edition of The Caucus. Huzzah to a great communicator.

Once again at the M&D, enjoying one of the all-time greats that I usually only have the privilege to sip on in Newport, Oregon, a Rogue Brutal Bitter.

First in the Nation,
BTB

All the Cool Kids Are Doing It

Life in 3-Q is now as passe as a 1950's life in 3-D while we sit knee deep in the hoopla about 2008, and rightly so given the breached-dam-like flood of candidates in the last week. Since my last post we have officially seen Hillary, Bill Richardson and Sam Brownback enter the fray, adding to the already crowded field. This is all very new, exciting and confusing for me. My recollections of primaries past are as follows:

2004:

• W has the GOP nomination locked up.
• John Kerry arrives as the early frontrunner, theoretically challenged by Gephardt. Dean comes on strong and steals the lead role until Iowa. He screams, Kerry wins, Edwards finishes strong, and next thing you know New Hampshire is over and Kerry's momentum is unstoppable.

2000:

• Early favorite Bush triumphs with a foreshadowing shadiness over McCain and the Straight Talk Express, while a bunch of yahoos like Steve Forbes, Liddy Dole, Orrin Hatch, Gary Bauer and Alan Keyes wallow in the background.
• Bill Bradley puts up a minor affront to Albert Gore, Jr.'s campaign, and is quickly and repeatedly snuffed. A real no-brainer.

Now we have '08. Whereas the last two cycles could be likened more accurately to Wrestlemania affairs consisting of two-man, and occasional tag-team, title matches we now have a true Royal Rumble. Clinton! Obama! Edwards! Kerry! Richardson! Biden! Dodd! Kucinich! McCain! Giuliani! Romney! Brownback! Hunter! Paul! Live from Washington, DC! Tuesday! Tuesday! Tuesday! 2008!!!! As they say in the District, we built this city on talk and polls.

As the Fix shows, everyone already has a pollster, and this good article in the Times wisely mentions how Clark came in too late last year, a mistake certainly not to be made by anyone with a head on their shoulders this time around. Which reminds me of my lucid regrets of 11/3/04, when I was never more certain of anything in my damned life than I was of Wes Clark's ability to win a theoretical race against the Dub. This year, though, everyone is in it to win it. We could have a primary season like never before, with each debate and each state like the Round of 64. You know there is going to be a Cinderella. You know there is a Goliath in the wait. Who will be the SW Missouri State, and who will be the Arizona? We'll have to let New Hampshire sort them out...unless the rest of the country has something to say about it.

The snow and the frigid temps appear to be back on the Quabbin Radar. Here's to a relevant woodstove, and the necessity of layering. In Corsedonk We Trust,

BTB

The Bodacity of Hope

Just as the melting ice slowly twirls about in my tumbler of Old Pulteney Single Malt, the slowly twisting path of fresh-eyed optimism makes it's way back into the quadrennial path of the Presidency. This isn't to say that John Edwards isn't making a claim to the same exact mantle place, but the clearcut New Hope in this cycle has to be Barack Obama, who just a few days ago formed his Presidential exploratory committee. An excerpt from his exploratory announcement speech sums his wild path to stardom up succinctly when he says, "I certainly didn't expect to find myself in this position a year ago. But as I've spoken to many of you in my travels across the states these past months; as I've read your emails and read your letters; I've been struck by how hungry we all are for a different kind of politics."

So it has come about, the pipe dream of so many has now begun to show the tiniest bit of distant light in the uniquely political way of creating an opening to donate, donate, donate! With that, the Dems now have two monster front runners - Barack and the yet-to-announce Hillary, who had to play a little bit of damage control upon Obama's announcement. She cancelled her own press conference that day, live from Iraq, and spent the next day on a total media blitz. It wasn't any ordinary media blitz, either. Hilly made it clear that she was no Hawk on Iraq. She even went a little gut feeling Bush-y on us, telling NPR yesterday morning that "I was listening for a level of commitment to securing Iraq by the Iraqi government and the Iraqi army and police force that has been missing, and I didn't hear that." Now she and Chris Dodd both are advertising a troop cap, while Obama basks in his anti-war credentials from 2002. There he speaks of Civil War, just as today his team promotes him as a modern-day Honest Abe, an Illinoisan of modest experience but profound judgment. Problem is, he ain't Kentuck.

On the other side of the aisle, most of the noise has come from fringe candidates. The fervent anti-immigration Congressman Tom Tancredo (R-CO) has been rumored to announce any day now. His first, his last, his everything is immigration: "There is no doubt that America is facing an illegal immigration crisis. Currently, there are at least 12 million illegal aliens living in America I am absolutely opposed to amnesty or guest worker program in any form." That. of course, being the first line of his website's issues statement. I fully understand that I sound dismissive, but I want to make it clear that I have had very little direct negative impact placed upon my own livelihood by illegal aliens, so I must not have the clear understanding of it that Team T does. I mean, I get paid to teach fractions to 55 kids who weren't born here. I say bring 'em on! Tancredo, meanwhile, lists his favorite activities to be "skeet shooting" and "playing ball".

There is also Dr. Ron Paul (L-TX), who is briefly abandoning his Libertarian roots to battle for the GOP nod in 2008. Congressman Paul is an actual MD, and an OB-GYN to boot! He throws down a weekly column on his official government page and represents the Spring Break/old school cowboy Gulf Coast region of Galveston, TX and the Matagorda Islands. I read a Louis L'Amour book called Matagorda once. It was pretty badass. Let's hope Paul can be replaced on the fringe this year with, I dunno, Sam Brownback. More Brownback, just in case.

In non-Presidential news, Quabbin weather has been Qonsistently Qrapping out on us. All MLK weekend I would hear reports of impending snow and frigid temperatures, only to hear recanted forecasts and see a continuation of 40 degrees and drizzle. It dipped chilly on Wednesday, but here it is half past midnight on Thursday night and the 9pm snow schedule has been pushed back yet again. I left for a run at 8pm tonight hoping to come across some early flurries, but there was nothing in the air but a strange frozen mist that left a crunchy mix of frozen sand on the street. No blanket of snow, and certainly no white reflective covering on the roads. When I hit the Gulf Road wilderness I had to slow to a crawl because I literally couldn't see the ground in front of my feet. But Don't Stop Believin' was my theme song tonight, and I was able to stick it out past the blindness and get in a full run.

While I was out there, and having committed three miles, I started thinking about faith. It was faith of sorts that pushed me through the dark part of my run tonight. While I could not see the ground as I was running, I knew that there would always be something for me to land on because I had done it before, and because I wanted to do it again. I reckon there could have been a cavernous pothole, but I had faith that there wasn't. It was a small faith, but it was enough that I was proud to overcome my hurdle. When you think of the things that people do, and the strength one can gain, it really boggles the mind. On the one hand you have Martin Luther King, Jr. doing his amazing work. On the other you have a bunch of shitbags bent on destroying things. And then you have a Presidential race every four years where people waste days upon days of time watching pundits, write checks for $2,000 as often as they can, and spend hours in the cold waving signs on a November tuesday. None of this happens without faith. Even for the faithless, there are dark country roads and a running log waiting back at home. Everything goes well and I'll hit 35 this week for the first time in five months. I do it on faith that when I am out on the roads in the dark, that I will smell some old smell or remember some old memory that just might trigger some new idea of faith, and that will keep me going on one more run, keep me watching one more hour of convention coverage next July. Who knows, maybe I'll break 17 again. Maybe I'll get a job in the White House. Maybe I'll just pour myself another and worry about how I butchered all those pure and beautiful thoughts I had on the road with the frozen mist propping my hair up like I was some cameo actor in Twin Peaks.

Preparing to Fare Thee Well a couple of amigos,

BTB

Lodi Doddi

It was a big week in politics, and a rude awakening to Quabbin Qountry about the difficulty of being a part-time blogger. I was so preoccupied with track practice, a New Yorker article about Dem hopefuls, unexpected dates and, hell, even a smutty Stranger article, that the next thing I knew it was Saturday, mid-way through the third quarter of the Ravens-Colts game and I was in a horrible mood about Purple's inability to find the end zone. This doesn't even begin to take into account the numerous newspaper profiles and blog entries in this week's Times and Post. A couple of Keystone Reds later, I knew my only hope was to walk out to my automobile and coast all the way down Gulf Hill at speeds no less than 45mph and find the nearest internet cafe.

I guess to cover the basics, it would be important to mention that one of New England's invisible Senator's has officially announced his entry into the 2008 campaign. Christopher Dodd (D-CT), although the Nutmeg State's senior senator, has been relatively unknown outside of political circles for much of his twenty-six years in the more deliberative body. He is the son of a Senator with a ready-made politician's c.v. including two years in the Peace Corps, six years in the army and the rest in elected office. I love Connecticut and all, but it sounds pretty boring from here. On the bright side, the guy was born in Willimantic and lives in my fantasy basketball haven of Haddam, is known for his sharp wit and at one point in the late 80's as a womanizer side-by-side with Teddy K.

Conventional wisdom has it these days, that Denver will host the 2008 Democratic National Convention. The Rocky Mountain Front is in the "Hickenloop", so to speak. Seeking to reach out to those stubborn Westerners, expect a lot of "cowboy" patterned shirts and major speaking parts by Jon Tester, Ken Salazar, Mark Udall and Bill Richardson. Holy Shit, LoDo is going to be off the hook that week. The last night I recall being in Denver, I was sobbing and nearly passed out drunk on the sidewalk of South 14th and Champa Street, having just tipped over on my bike. The night in question was November 2, 2004. This time it is just the beginning, at the Pepsi Center. You say you want a Revolution? Well, you know, we all want to change the world.

Alas, there is a lot to catch up on, and cold days ahead may prove just cozy enough to provide the time and the place. In the meantime, Go 'Hawks!!

Ahoy,
BTB

Priorities

For Starters:

'Hawks Win! As a tatted up Jerramy Stevens might say: always hated, never faded. Well, the Seahawks actually were faded on seven different occasions, but here we are in the tournament and Seattle is undefeated and headed to Chicago with hopes of revenge for the 37-6 trouncing at the hands of the Bears back in week 4. The Quabbin is feeling very Qonfident that the 'Hawks can pull it off on the road and head into another NFC championship game with the head of a large bear on the end of their pointed talons. Quite frankly, I think it will be another wacky one chock full of fumbles and field goals and flags. Bring it on.

In other sporting news I ran ten miles today, once again exceeding my bounds in the name of ambition that regrettably seems to fade every four days. Having just packed it in mentally and decided to cut my proposed hour-long run down to a five mile jaunt through the woods at daylight's end, I was surprised with an unexpected visit from the Rosen family on a 12-miler that tracked past my house. It felt so good to run with another human that I ended up hanging on beyond the Pelham Meetinghouse, all the way down Southeast Road and over Route 9, to the point where I was bound for the diez. I braved it alone up the Smith's Orchard hill, struggling all the way with only the rushing sound of Scarboro Brook and the desire to warm my slowly freezing hands to keep me on task. Aye, and I made it, and in time to jot down another 3Q post.

While I was running up that last hill, my mind kept returning to the days when large inclines actually beckoned me and endurance was something that I owned and embraced. Relatively speaking, I could probably say the same thing about myself today but it is so hard to live up the past. Those thoughts got me pondering, yet again, the idea of priorities. Once upon a time my main priority was to hit my weekly mileage - whether 45, 60, 70, 75, 85 or 90 - and prepare well enough on the outside of those runs to try to live up to my slightly distorted self-image on race day. It almost never happened, but on those two or three days that it did everything was sweet. Every mile in the cold and every extra repeat and every night that I didn't go out partying was worth it because of 1580 seconds worth of ground covered on a given course.

People respect priorities, that is why professional sports is such a big deal. I have tried a number of times in my life to de-emphasize the NFL, NBA and MLB because of the great amounts of excess inherently involved in 70,000 seat stadiums and 7-year, $34M contracts for doing something that has little social impact, and often times even less athletic impact. But for the rest of the athletes on the field, success is a priority. That is why they people pay $1,000 for playoff tickets, why networks flash fantasy statistics at the bottom of the tv screen during regular season football games, why cities raise their taxes to keep a pro team in town.

I have had a number of priorities in my life, but nothing was ever as big as athletic achievement.

For others it has been business dominance, musical statement, marriage, social justice, hustling, pimping, and the success of their children. Halfway through my third decade of life, I realize that priorities are a tough thing to latch onto, and an even tougher thing to fulfill. Growing up, one's priorities may shift from week to week, and usually center on one's self. In high school and college, often times you figure out where you want to focus to lie (i.e. partying, getting laid, making the soccer team, getting a library job, driving a hot car, etc.). But once that is over the whole landscape changes. You mature into your mid-twenties and next thing you know, you want to be a little less selfish, and you want to make your way in the world. All of the sudden you realize that music career isn't going to get you very far, and you aren't going to make any money running unless you can go under fourteen minutes in the 5k.

Finding that next priority is the rub. 25-year-olds without priorities wander aimlessly through a life of odd jobs and different cities, unless you believe the bumper sticker that reads not all who wander are lost. Politicians without priorities, of course, wind up in the Senate and often win the Democratic nomination for the Presidency.

This era's political priority, for better or for worse, is most certainly Iraq. The land where Uday Hussein once oversaw the Iraqi Olympic Committee and the national Football Federation with a bloody, ball-clenching fist is now hands down the biggest concern of every major national politician. The priority today for a candidate is to be hawkish about fulfilling our responsibility or staunch about a long-standing opposition to the mess. Now with Bush, McCain, Lieberman and others calling for a "surge" in troops (sadly, not a Surge for troops), it may become that much more of a priority to America.

Joe Biden, meanwhile, finds it to be a huge priority but in some senses a false priority. He claimed recently that the Bush White House has given up and is only looking to add more troops in order to stick it to whomever takes over, saying "They have no answer to deal with how badly they have screwed it up. I am not being facetious now. Therefore, the best thing to do is keep it from totally collapsing on your watch and hand it off to the next guy -- literally, not figuratively." He goes on in another interview to add, "I’m not trying to be a wise guy in saying this, but . . . I totally underestimated the incompetence and arrogance of this administration once they were given the power to use power in Iraq. It is actually mind-blowing.” Ladies and gentlemen, Joe Biden! I've met the guy in person, and I can't tell you how happy I am that he is entering the race.

Frank Rich wrote another good column about our Iraq ties, this time in relation to The Timely Death of Gerald Ford, as he puts it. Rich recollects Ford most prescient achievement not to be the pardoning of Richard Nixon, but the ending of American involvement in Vietnam. He quotes from Ford's April 23, 1975 speech at Tulane:

"Today, America can regain the sense of pride that existed before Vietnam. But it cannot be achieved by re-fighting a war that is finished as far as America is concerned...We, of course, are saddened indeed by the events in Indochina. But these events, tragic as they are, portend neither the end of the world nor of America's leadership in the world. Let me put it this way, if I might. Some tend to feel that if we do not succeed in everything everywhere, then we have succeeded in nothing anywhere. I reject categorically such polarized thinking. We can and we should help others to help themselves. But the fate of responsible men and women everywhere, in the final decision, rests in their own hands, not in ours."

It is implicit in the speech that Ford had the courage to say such things. Certainly following a decade spent killing hundreds of thousands of Viet Cong and peasants alike, with some 60,000 US Soldiers tragically filling out the casualty list, it would have been a difficult choice for a leader to simply stop. Talk about a bad break up. Yet it was Ford who did this, and more importantly admitted that we could go on afterward in the face of the Cold War. Iraq will be a different story, with current technology allowing a small cell of Unckie Sam-hating baddies to inflict damage on our person, as opposed to a gaudy and gutless Soviet Union.

Some are born with priorities. Some achieve priorities. Some have priorities thrust upon them. I remember the days when I was just trying to break five minutes. Now we just hope the death toll stays below five US troops each day.

Ahoy from the Quabbin, sausage stew and Scotch on the rocks.

House Party

With official swearing-in duties over and done, the Democrats have taken over leadership duties in both the US House and Senate and I really couldn't care much less. I don't mean to be cynical, just forgetful. After a long legislative vacation, due in part to the permanent campaign and in part to the holiday season, it feels like congress has actually been do-nothing for at least 2 months. Out of sight, out of mind. Throw in all of the false promise of partnership for the new year and I would rather just skip the newspaper for a couple of days. But alas, I will give some mention to the momentous occasion that is the first edition of Madam Speaker. Well, because we must think of the children. Now bring on the legislation, and that right slowly!

The Fix tells us today that Giuliani has added more staff, including Arnold's old communications director. The Fix, I might add, truly is a fix for the political junkie. If you don't read it a few times a week already, I would recommend it as a prescient New Year's Resolution. My boy Howard Kurtz is tight and all, but this blows Media Notes out of the water.

Well, there is only so much to say out here in Quabbin Qountry and two posts in as many days leaves a fellow breathless sometimes. Give me my leave, good sirs and madam speakers, that I may look up at the still-blazing moon and feel the early spring air drift up the valley in pockets of wind and warmth.

Ahoy,
BTB

The Moon Is So Bright,

To paraphrase Timbuk3, I Gotta Wear Shades.

The amount of moonlight coming down on Quabbin Qountry was tantamount to LUNAcy. I hopped out of the cabin around 8:15 tonight, and my first few steps alongside the neighbor's pasture were chock full of sheer giddiness. I literally bounded down the lane for the first hundred meters or so until the shade of the trees finally kicked in to cloud my vision ever so slightly. By the time I got down the hill near Cadwell I began to harbor illusions that I could run in the woods. Obviously, I gave it a try. I made it roughly 55 seconds down the trail before I turned around, partly out of wariness of the dark, partly out of my inability to keep pace along the shadowy, rocky path. Nevertheless, I put in a solid 2 minutes on trail at 8:20pm in January. It would be a stretch to find much negativity in that.

Now here we are, one more 3Q entry in the books, and one year closer to Presidential Go Time according to the last two digits of today's date (1/03/07). Happy New Year. After a Dem-happy December (Dem-cember, if you will), the GOP is back in the limelight with mixed results. The most newsworthy event, if you count media coverage, ended up being Rudy's folly. Giuliani made headlines today with a leaked document allegedly stolen from a staffer, copied, and replaced in it's original briefcase. The paper, hardly containing anything surprising, went over the possible hurdles for a Rudy candidacy.

All along I had found most of the skepticism over the former NYC mayor's candidacy a bit questionable, but now I am starting to see it. We here in Quabbin Qountry are all for seeing RWG toss his hat in because of his leadership qualities and presumably bipartisan nature, but his messy divorce and the Bernie Kerik baggage should be a tough sell especially in the Republican primaries. Granted, personal lives should be withheld from politics to an extent, but there is something to be said about one's character when he leaves his wife immediately for someone else, and then the ex- summarily hates him. It is one thing to get a blow job at your desk, it is entirely another to be boinking around so seriously. I imagine this plays doubly so in early primaries like South Carolina and Iowa.

The Kerik affair is truly the most intriguing bit of his entire campaign. Many of you will recall that Bernie once seemed like the American Dream come true - son of a New Jersey prostitute done good - and a tremendous choice to lead the Department of Homeland Security. But then came nannygate and, ultimately more devastating, Regangate. My favorite part about all of this, if Rudy ends up running and if Kerik becomes a major issue, is that OJ Simpson will play a role in Presidential politics. Judith Regan, Bernie's one time sordid lover, was recently axed from a prominent position at HarperCollins publishing allegedly for anti-Semitic comments...but clearly for her decision to publish OJ's memoir, If I Did It. The "It", of course, refers not to sex but to the murder of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman. Unbelievable. In fact, I sincerely hope this becomes an issue.

The other news, of course, pertains to Mitt Romney's filing for a Presidential exploratory committee. Much like Edwards earlier in the week, Mitt was overshadowed but both the Rudy scandal and the Ford funeral. Poor Mitt; not only did his Lieutenant get completely destroyed in the election to replace him, but he can't even make the local NPR news. At least, not when I was listening. On the bright side, at least Rom was able to make the historic Lone Walk today, following the footsteps of "Silent" Cal Coolidge, John Hancock and Michael Dukakis.

I'm Mitt Romney, and I disapprove of my 2nd page headlines.

Now for the lighter side. Let us take a moment to mock fundraising. In the spirit of Dubya's Rangers and Pioneers, Mitt Romney has decided to go political with those designated as "First Ballot Chairman" responsible for $250,000 in contributions in the campaign's first 30 days, "First Ballot Vice Chair" for $100,000 in donations, and "First Ballot Member" $50,000. Rudy, meanwhile, is going baseball, calling his top donors "Team Captain", "MVP", "All-Star" and "Slugger". "Slugger"? Wasn't that the name of Buddy Cole's softball team? Oh, those confused Republicans. And last but not least, outgoing Florida governor John "Jeb" Bush has chosen to include within his gubernatorial portrait a blackberry and a bible. You heard right, not only can he talk to God but he can e-mail him, too!

On a more somber note, my condolences go out to friends, family, and general populace who were saddened by the shooting death of a Foss High School student on school grounds this morning in Tacoma, Washington. We here in Quabbin Qountry wish, along with the rest of the world, for a more peaceful new year.



Sipping a Val Dieu,

BTB